The week of the metaphorical "step back"

As the title suggests, I was not the most diligent of "pledgers" this week.  Despite the many steps forward I feel I've taken, I'd call this week an overall "step back."  Considering my most recent weigh in (down to 209.8... a total loss of 11.8lbs!), I think I'm being a little rough on myself... however, I'm well aware that the next 30 lbs will not come off if I keep this behavior up. 

It all started on Thursday night.  Actually, it started Wednesday night when I couldn't resist the temptation of a McDonald's hot fudge sundae... But hey, of all the things I could eat at McDonald's, a hot fudge sundae is definitely the lesser of many evils. Well, perhaps my pledge vacation really began last weekend when I drank more than a "moderate" amount alcohol and decided to get some late-night, slightly drunk food... I'm often left unsatisfied with such dining escapades, but that was definitely not the case last weekend.  I had the most delicious tacos known to woman, leaving me with the lasting imperssion of drunk-food as an ever-satisfying experience.  Not good.

Anyway...back to Thursday. I went out to dinner with my dear roommate Sean and his wonderful sister Jessie as well as her equally wonderful boyfriend Joe.  We met at this east-African restaurant, and since I'd never been before I'd decided I could go "all out."  And go all out I did.  Not only did I get a beer, I also opted for the combo platter rather than the normal, single portion.  Guess who ate every crumb or dollup of her gravy/curry-esque "slop" (for lack of better descriptors)?!  I sure as hell did.  I also ate the majority of the spongey sourdough tortilla of sorts it was served on... I apologize for the very rough and improper (yet hopefully non-offensive) terminology.  I wasn't really suffering from eater's remorse, however, as I know the occasional "step back" will happen.  But I did feel a little guilty about the fact that Jessie and Joe treated... what doll-faces!

Speaking of Jessie and Joe, I actually met them in the middle of a GAGAerobics session.  I was likely on the floor doing one of my many abdominal exercises, but  observers unfamiliar with GAGAcise could easily mistake such techniques for birthing methods.  And, per usual, I was sweating like an 8th grade boy at a roller rink... for those of you who haven't been to a roller rink in awhile, that's pretty damn sweaty (yes, I was just at a roller rink last weekend).

Back to my pledge-deviation.  Well, not only did I eat too much African cuisine on Thursday night, I then decided to get some frozen yogurt.  And by some, I mean a copius amount of it.  Sure, frozen yogurt's not all that bad for you.  But once you add some Twix pieces, chocolate chips, white chocolate chips, graham cracker crumbs and cookie dough, your once healthy treat has become no more than a vehicle for chocolate. 

The week of the metaphorical "step back" continued on Saturday night.  AJ, one of my best gay boyfriends, was having a housewarming party.  There was much wine and hors d'oeuvres involved, and once again I was not holding back.  Deciding I could drink as much as I wanted lead to the decision that I could eat whatever I wanted.  AJ and his roommates Jon and Tiffany are quite the little kitchen warriors, so I was unable to resist their pesto pizzas, tomato tarts, quiches, cheeses and LITTLE SMOKIES!  And Jon may have single handedly destroyed The Pledge of Glory with his lemon ricotta cookies...  seriously, these were the most delicious non-chocolate cookies ever.  I had not one, not two, but three of them.  It seems I had triple portions of everything I ate that night... the Jackie of yesteryear was back.  It was actually a little frightening.  It was as if I was getting this high from knowing I was cheating on my diet... I kept eating not because I wanted to, but because I knew I wasn't supposed to being so.  I guess that's how dieitng goody-goodies "rebel."  How pathetic.

Just as my food choices had been lack-luster, so was my exercise routine.  I took the whole weekend off from GAGAerobics, and this likely had much to do with my pledge-deviation.  Just hearing the music is enough to motivate me.  So yesterday when I GAGAcised for the first time in what felt like forever, I was instantly back on the wagon.  It's a new week and a new opportunity to kick some Pledge of Glory ass.

Here's hoping that, unlike my dream last night, I'm able to refrain from competitive cupcake eating contests!

"I just wanted to take a moment because we lost a little monster this week... Jamey, I know you're looking down on us and you're not a victim, you're a lesson to all of us."  -- Lady Gaga (when dedicating her song "Hair" to Jamey Rodemeyer, a bullied gay 14-year-old  who recently took his life)

Love. Peace. GAGAerobics.

Jackie

And first...the bad news.

Yes, there is yet more good and bad news in the land of GAGAerobics.  The bad news is (as if I need to tell you), I suck at keeping up with this blog!  Again, it's been two weeks :S  In my defense, I'm having some major issues accessing the internet at our apartment...so, the only place I can get online is work, and I often don't have time there to post an entire blog.  They actually expect me to do hotel-related things there!  The gall!  But I also have good news, and it's very good news -- I'm far better at the losing weight aspect of The Pledge than I am the blogging portion of it!  Just how much better you ask?!  Well, The Pledge of Glory officially began on August 8...exactly 6 weeks ago.  In these past 6 weeks I've managed to drop 10.5 lbs!!!  I'm down from 221.6 lbs to 210.1!!! Believe me when I say, if I can do it anyone can. 

Not that this has been easy by any means, but everything I've done has been very reasonable...you know, things I can feasibly continue come late April.  Sure, I'm "dieting," but Lord knows I never go hungry.  The way I see it, I can eat as many "fruits of the earth" as I'd like...fruits, veggies, nuts, etc.  And don't think I never cheat...I do (especially on the weekends).  But when I do, I try my darndest to apply the Ellen Hauser method:  consume very sensible portions (at the Old Fashioned the other night, that meant eating 6 cheese curds as opposed to an entire order, and drinking one beer as opposed to four plus).  And my exercise routine is also very do-able.  I probably do GAGAerobics 3-4 times a week, and supplement that with rollerblading at least twice a week.  I can't tell you how effective GAGAerobics is!  I seriously sweat my tits off every time I do it...well, I'd like to think I'm sweating my love-handles and side-boobs off instead ;)  Perhaps the best thing about GAGAerobics is its efficiency... if I'm running short on time (Lord knows I always am), I simply put in The Fame Monster.  This, GAGA's second CD, is only 35 minutes long!  Seriously, every single one of us can set asside a half an hour for exercise!  Especially if it's this fun...

But just because it's fun, doesn't mean it's easy.  Right, Shane Buchli?!  I hate to throw you under the bus, love, but "the people" need to hear just how challenging GAGAerobics can be!  My dearest Shane came down to Madison last weekend for a visit.  So, naturally, we decided to do a little GAGAerobics together.  I kid you not, we were 4 songs in and Shane opted to sit the second half of the CD out!  And Shane is not an unshapely man...he regularly runs and plays tennis!  Since our little GAGAcising session, Shane has crafted a pledge of his own...he's vowed to do 30 minutes of MADONNAerobics each day until the spring release of her newest CD.  When watching me GAGAcise, Shane called me "an inspiration," and I doubt I've ever been more proud.  Such supportive friends and family have played a large role in the success of The Pledge of Glory.

Well, enough with all this talk...it's time to get an extended GAGAerobics session in!!!  I'm gonna pop the Born This Way CD in and dance off the pounds ala Richard Simmons!!!  Again, I invite each and every one of you to join me!  Seriously, any time!   

Can't get enough Pledge of Glory?!  Follow me each dance-step of the way on Twitter @PledgeOfGlory (or Jackie Hauser...I still don't fully understand this whole Twitter thing). Like Shane Buchli, I'd love to know if you've crafted a pledge of your own! If so, tweet at me, facebook me or comment on my blog!

Here's hoping the female hotel guest I referred to as "sir" (not once, but twice) will eventually forgive me :S  Oh, and avoid the peaches at Trader Joes, but do not hesitate to buy their nectarines!!!

Love. Peace. GAGAerobics.

"You want to live the dream?  You do what you want on your own terms." - Courtney Love

Jackie

Ok, Cupid...

Well, y'all... I'm not one to disseminate stereotypes about women.  After all, I am one... and a feminist at that.  However, the free online dating service "Ok Cupid" has me wondering whether women are as perplexing, moody and hard to read as men like to think we are.  I've, shall we say, "pursued" very few women, but in each attempt I've been rejected (what a harsh word) by chicks who have given me every reason to believe they're quite in to me.  Wouldn't texts like "Is that an inivitation? Lol. Can't wait." and "Do you at some point want to have children?" lead you to believe one is rather interested? And in the case of the latter, extremely interested?  Lord, the first and only date I've gone on as a result of Ok Cupid seemed to go well.  Sure, it was pretty obvious (likely to both of us) that we didn't have a whole lot in common, but she texted immediately after and said "I had fun :)."  Not to mention the several seemingly desperate texts I got prior to the date. Nevertheless, I never heard from her again... even after I drunkenly texted her a couple days later.  It's not like I'm extremely disappointed about the whole affair, I'm just a little puzzled.  Who am I kidding?!  I wanted to have children with this girl!

Moving on...  Well, there have been both good and bad happenings in the land of GAGAerobics.  First, I incorporated my new balance ball (courtesy Jeff and Ellen Hauser) into the routine today!  It'll be a great way to keeps things fresh.  Unfortuntalely, one of my other new additions, the shake weight, is out of commission.  That's what I get for ordering the damn thing on Amazon!  Take it from me, when you purchase a shake weight of your own, and you should, spend the extra money and buy it at Target.

In other news, despite eating an entire Falbo's calzone last night (give me a break, I hadn't eaten any variation of pizza in almost a month!), I seem to be down 5 or 6 lbs!  If I can trust my dear friend Morgan's scale, I'm down from 221.6 to 215.7 lbs!!!  Damn...  I can't tell you how stoked I am about that!  Speaking of Morgan, a former roommate of  two years and one of my very best friends, the poor girl seems to be bearing the entire brunt of my dieting rage.  I don't know how she came to be so lucky. Wait, perhaps it's not dieting frustration directed at Morgan... maybe it has something to do with the fact she thinks I wear too much product in my hair.  How dare she?!  If you've seen my hair lately, you know it's perfection.  And you likely know who's responsible for it...Morgan!  Can't thank you enough, girl.

Here's hoping I'll stop being such a biyotch to Ms. Morgan... and that I'm able to find some remotely delicious peaches (Trader Joe's has nothing on the Amish either).

Love. Peace. GAGAerobics.

"‎Do not allow people to dim your shine because they are blinded. Tell them to put on some sunglasses, cuz we were born this way bitch!" - Lady Gaga

Jackie